Resilience (riˈzilyəns)- the ability to bounce back from setbacks. To thrive, grow and be effective in the face of adversity, challenges and change.
- Marketing plan for business completed and ready to roll out before the end of June- Check
- My speaking points and marketing materials ready for Women’s Entrepreneur Empowerment event in three days- Check
- Networking events and opportunities to participate in on deck for the summer-Check
- Unexpected broken leg before participating in any of the abovementioned – Unfortunately ……Check
So while I was enjoying spending time with my daughter on her class trip to the skating rink, the unexpected happened, yes, I broke my leg. All I could think about was how much this broken leg is going to slow me down from getting all I need to get done. And now I have to depend on others to help me with things that were once so easy to do. This is a bit of a nightmare for a woman who’s used to being so independent.
Within an instant everything has changed.
This situation has me thinking a lot about how unexpected changes and challenges can occur in our lives at any point in time. This also has me thinking about how we respond to challenges determines how we can best navigate that experience.
As I laid in the emergency room, my mind began going down the road of “if only I didn’t go skating”, “I shouldn’t have tried to skate with my daughter and just watched her” “why did I have to go and do that”? But those thoughts lead to feelings of sadness and feeling sorry for myself. So I began thinking about how I have a positive support system that came to my aid without even thinking twice. And knowing this situation is only temporary, really helped to reset my thoughts to focus on the positive.
This will not stop me from moving forward in my coaching business, and enjoying my summer with family and friends.
Today I want to share 4 ways to manage those troubling thoughts before they lead to negative emotions and learn to be resilient in spite of unexpected challenges.
1. Face reality, but know there is hope– It’s easier said than done, but definitely possible. During tough situations, we sometimes choose to dance around reality and begin focusing on how it should be and what should have happened, which slows down the process of managing reality to begin moving forward. Whether you’re experiencing a break-up in a relationship, a health diagnosis, layoff, or even passed over for a promotion, once you bring yourself to accept the circumstances, you can begin dealing with your emotions and then manage how to move forward. When you remain in denial, your situation only tends to get worse and this is how people become “stuck”.
2. Push towards positivity/Maintain your joy– Negative thoughts and mind traps will occur, but it’s how you manage your thoughts that get you through tough times and reduce anxiety levels. When you begin to go down the path of thinking irrationally, it prevents you from creating a true contingency plan. Start paying attention to what is right in your life and it will help you filter out the negative thoughts. While you’re in the midst of a storm, take a deep breath and then take a moment to think of the blessings surrounding you. The value you place in that will support you in transcending any difficulty while maintaining your peace and joy.
3. Ask for help- Being resilient is not all about having it together on your own. And reaching out to others for help is not seen as a sign of weakness. Having a solid support system will get you through the toughest of times. Who’s in your circle? Do you have a solid group of people who will wrap around you during your toughest moment and strengthen you at your weakest? If not, now is the time to build or identify those that will.
4. Prayer…lots of it– Being quiet and still during difficult times gives you a chance to become more centered as well as mentally and spiritually restored. Whenever feelings of pity, guilt or sadness try to overtake you, remember talking to God is a way to become refocused on the big picture.
What are some challenges you’ve faced that you were able to overcome? What are some ways that helped you in becoming resilient? Leave a comment below or inbox me your feedback.
If what I’ve shared resonates with you, then definitely share with your friends and family, and don’t forget to subscribe to my list.
Also if you’re tired of being stagnate and ready to move forward in your life and career, then I’m here for you! Also check out my Contact Me page.
Until next time…Greatness Awaits
Raphaela
What a beautiful post! I had a similar experience a few years ago when I broke my wrist by slipping on ice, and it really threw me for a loop. I was living alone and was used to a very full schedule and tight deadlines – no time to waste. I had to slow down, ask my friends for help, and figure out a way to move forward. I too played the game in my head of: “If I hadn’t been rushing…”, “If I hadn’t been trying to catch SEPTA…”, “If I had just been more careful…”, however, in the end, I had to accept that I couldn’t go back and change what had happened. I really could have used your four steps to get through that experience with more grace :). Thank you!
I love this post! A few years ago I slipped on ice and broke my right wrist (my writing hand), and didn’t know what to do next. I was used to a very full schedule with no time to waste, and was living on my own at the time. I definitely played the game of wishing I could have walked slower or not been on that street that night, but in the end I had to face facts and figure out a way to move forward. I really could have used this 4-step process to deal with that situation with more grace! Thank you!
Hi Raphaela! I loved this post! I commented by accident twice because I didn’t think my first comment had made it :). Feel free to accept the one you like best :).
Hope all is well!
Julie
Hi Julie!:) I’m so glad this post resonated with you. Thanks so much for sharing your story. I’m definitely hanging in there and know this is only temporary. Stay in touch!